Scottish Fish Invent Sex & Other (more minor) News

Hi friends —

Again, learning to write is taking up a fair amount of time, but I could not let the day pass without letting you and particularly my Scottish mother know that Scottish fish invented sex. (Hi Mom! Let’s not discuss this in any more detail please!)

I wish I had the rights to the photo, but I don’t, so if for some reason you don’t want to click on the link, let me tell you that according to the scientists — who are being 100% serious and not in any way leading us on or yanking our chain — a species of fish named Microbrachius dicki were the “first-known animal to stop reproducing by spawning and instead mate by having sex.”

These fish look like armadillos with fins. They have little spikes where their naughty parts are. They are they fish I would nominate as the fish least likely to invent sex if I could find someone willing to take me up on the bet, but apparently, um …

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In other news, thanks to Lisa M. for alerting me to this effort to save hedgehogs by creating a wee little landscape full of little tunnels and miniature stairs.

Honestly, if we couldn’t muster what it took to save the hedgehogs — when they are undeniably adorable, and the price of saving them is to build twee fairy gardens like a tiny world for forest sprites — if we aren’t willing to take steps like that, I feel like we would be in dire straits indeed. But, fortunately, it does appear that the program has taken off and hedgehogs have a chance to make a comeback in the U.K.

Being cute (or beautiful) is not enough to win the heart of a conservationist, however.

If you live on the east coast and you see the lovely spotted lanternfly, you are advised to kill it. It’s an invasive species that apparently threatens “everything from oak, walnut and poplar trees to grapes, almonds and fruit orchards.”

NYC Parks @NYCParks

Have no fear, you are a civic hero! Spotted lanternflies are a threat to our city's forests. NYC, be like Sara! If you see a spotted lanternfly, squish it, dispose of it, and report it to us at nyc.gov/parks/slf.

sara london @sjessielondon

killed a spotted lanternfly today. was it justifiable homicide? will i be acquitted of this crime? please defend me @NYCParks i won’t do well in prison https://t.co/idZ1Z0oLqX

Got that? If you live in the U.K., start building twee tunnels. If you’re on the east coast, start zapping those pretty lanternbugs. And if you’re Scottish … well, I hope your life is finding a way.